Mini-Games Madness Volume #1 – Hello World! Wii U Review
Play this to learn how to NOT make a fun/functional piece of software
Everything
Games are not fun
Splash screen will make you puke on your own face
A New World Record –
Mini-Games Madness Volume #1 – Hello World! deserves to be in the world record book as it breaks the record for worst game ever made, worst compilation title ever made, and worse menu screen of all time.
Watch my quick YouTube walk-through to understand.
Composed of a total of four mini games, each one is more terrible than the last. Eels and Ladders is a Chutes and Ladders rip off that is literally nothing more than tapping one button on the touch screen to get a random dice-roll and isn’t even the right aspect ratio, Mini-Farmer doesn’t even work, Copter is a Flappy Bird clone that just starts without warning so the player instants dies, and Cave Run is a pointless and dark endless runner with super floaty jumps.
This Wii U eShop title was probably made by one kid in high school learning how to program and to just finish a thought. I did the same thing in college; I made my own games and apps just to say “hey look, I made this.” I am guess that is where the “hello world” aspect of the title comes from, indicating this is just a first learning trial. However, something like this should never be published to the mass public, let alone for actual money. Students add this crap to their portfolio as a way to get a job somewhere and show early programming skills to friends. How Nintendo actually approved this for the Wii U eShop is a huge mystery and apparently that Nintendo Seal of Quality program is no longer in effect.
However, the icing on the cake is the wicked putrid splash screen. I originally thought something was wrong with my Wii U Gamepad. Not only can you not understand what the hell is going on, you will get a seizure if you stare at this screen for just a couple of minutes. This screen doesn’t even work let alone indicate any sense of entertainment.
There are so many things wrong and not fun with this game I don’t know where to start. Instead of wasting $5 for this piece of garbage, you will have more fun folding up a five-dollar bill, dropping it down a sewer drain, and watching it float away. Now if you’ll excuse me, I am going to go play some Superman 64.
Not As Good As: nothing
Better Than: getting stabbed in the jaw
Also Try: hating yourself
By: Zachary Gasiorowski, Editor in Chief myGamer.com
Twitter: @ZackGaz
This should be everyone’s quote of the day “Splash screen will make you puke on your own face”